Things my best friend does...

…trips up the stairs

…likes laundry detergent on facebook

…comes over, then consistently makes my bed for me

…gets weirdly possessive of my bean bag chair

…yells “JENNY JENNY JENNY” across the entire dining hall

…yells “JENNY JENNY JENNY” across…anywhere

…gives me wrong directions, when she’s already using a GPS

…forces me to yell “IS IT CLOSER TO CALIFORNIA…OR TO THE OCEAN?!” When she can’t tell me to take highway east or west.

…trips down the stairs, lands, and stays there, then gets on her laptop.

…tells me that I can just wax her eyebrows for her.

…okay, maybe not the eyebrows, but will I do her nails?

…leaves me in the living room of her house with her family I’ve never been introduced to…because she really had to pee.

…shouts “OH BABY” every time someone says anything remotely sexual.

…and puts up with me.