Too hot in my first class...

...friggen FREEZING in this one.

At least now I'm mostly awake.

I've been super busy, going on busier. But that doesn't mean there isn't some funny stuff going on.

Take my friend's birthday party, courtesy of yours truly.

I went to Wal-Mart earlier in the day with one clear goal: Get her an ice-cream cake.  Also...some sort of present?  Didn't know what.

So I'm wandering through Wal-Mart looking for a birthday present thinking that I'm gonna get the ice cream cake last so it doesn't melt.

Totally smart right?

And I'm thinking, what do I really want to get this girl?  The thought popped into my head that I'd just LOVE to give her the chance to beat the crap out of some of the crappy people in her life.  Hahahah....wait.

Idea!






.............So I'm in the pinata section, which is an actual section in the party section at the Leicester Super Wal-Mart, pondering if getting a donkey pinata is advocating animal cruelty.

But pinatas, as it turns out, are friggen' expensive and even though her ResHall is Hello Kitty themed she's not getting a Hello Kitty pinata.

As funny as a beaten Hello Kitty would be.

So the donkey it is.

Everyone knows what you're doing that night when you carry around a pinata and candy.  Everyone.  They think you're having a little kid's birthday party.

And I'm in college, so yeah,  pretty much.

So me and my festive multicolored friend make our way to the ice cream section.   Where they don't have ice cream cake.

So I head over to the bakery section, only to find that the freezer was totally empty.  Cool.  Alright.

I'm looking at the other cakes, including a ridiculously large cookie, and thinking that dammit, all she wanted was a friggen' ice cream cake.

Is that so hard?

Finally I ask, and yay!  Their freezer broke yesterday but they have all the other ice cream cakes in the back in a separate freezer.

So I got the cake, proceeded to check out, and walk into the almost 85 degree heat and to my truck with no AC.

I pretty much raced back to campus to make sure my hard-won cake did not melt.

It doesn't, I get it into the freezer, and as far as I know life is good.

I'm mentioning the party to a couple people at dinner including my new supervisor.  I explain the cake fiasco (because to me it was a fiasco) and finally remember that oh hey, I bought a pinata.  It comes out a little something like this:

"Non-melted ice cream cake.  Good stuff.  Also...pinata"

Now "Also...pinata" is kind of a joke.  All of my program proposals now have to have "also...pinata" somewhere within them.  It's necessary.  Trust me.

I haven't even gotten to the good part.

It's finally time for the birthday party.  We've got the whole thing ready to go, played 50 cent when she walked in:

(Yo Yo Yo Yo, Yo Shorty, it's your birthday...)

Hehe.  We sang Happy Birthday very off-key, and then it was time for the pinata.

I tied the pinata with some ribbon to a sturdy ceiling beam in the basement that is popularly thought to be haunted.  No big deal.

So we get her down there, and I hand her an umbrella (because hey, it's a lot for me to remember that you have to have a STICK to break a pinata).

Andddddddddddd I forgot the blindfold.  But with this particular person, the honor system works fairly well.  She spins 3 times, eyes screwed shut, and swings.

And misses.

Always so funny.  So she swings again.  And clips it.  She's getting frustrated.  She finds it with the umbrella, gears herself up, and SWINGS.

And decapitates the pinata.

The body is sitting on the floor, the head dangling from the ribbon, and the candy is still safely contained within the donkey.

At this point we tell the birthday girl to open her eyes, because man, she's gotta see this.

She opens her eyes, and at our encouragement, starts beating the pinata on the ground with the umbrella.

Are you picturing this?  It was amazing.

...but the pinata still wouldn't break.  I tell her to stop, I pick up the pinata, and tell her to get into the batter's box.

She shifts the umbrella so it's like a baseball bat, I slow pitch the pinata to her, and she swings.

And it exploded.

Candy went flying all over the room, at everyone, and in every corner.  We cleaned it all up and placed it all back into the decapitated head.

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You better believe that she still has that decapitated head in her room.